Dear Loud Next Door Neighbours:

Please shut up. Also please stop cursing at your 3 year old kid. Yes, I heard you call her a bitch. SHE'S THREE FOR HEAVENS SAKE. Also please stop telling your children that birds have teeth, and please go inside your house to vomit. I would like to have my window open because it gets hotter than hell inside my room, but I'd rather not have to hear the contents of your stomach being emptied out onto your driveway. Thank you very much.

Love, Lauren